Reasons for actions taken.

Pastors, Ministers, Councilors, Worship Leaders, Ushers, Elders, Etc... I'm sure I'm missing a couple, but whats the main reason behind it all?? I mean, we go to school for a degree, in Ministry, Worship, Pastoring, and all that awsome stuff... but is that somethinng that you truly need schooing for? I don't mean to open up a can of worms, but if you don't truly have the heart for any of these, why even bother schooling? What are you really going to accomplish?? If you don't have a heart for the lost, the ones that are really needing the love, and compassion, comfort and hope... Why?? You may have the right words, awsome voice, the best strategy or "game plan" but all of that is nothing without Passion, Love, and Hope. Many pastors want their church to grow big and strong, many worship leaders have the dream of one day traveling and singing to many nations and be known for their style and their voice. Lets be real!! I admit to having thought like that for some time. Actually, if I can be very honest with you all, I was holding on to this one ministry for all the wrong reasons. and here goes my true reasons for having to let it go. As much as I love it, I had to let it go. When I was younger I never really thought I would ever be anything in the church. as far as a minister or pastor or any of these fancy titles. as I grew older I began to sing in the worship band along with my sister Daisy Garcia. Honestly, thanx to her I was able to develop my talent. So everything was fine and dandy, Until I led for the 1st time... can I say...scary!!! That's another story in itself, but my point is that I began to cling to certain people, believing that they were the ones that would take me where I needed to be. or push me to the "top" so to speak. It's not a horrible thing, however I began to totally depend on them, and where they would take me. Almost like a security blanket. Now thats bad. How horrible is it to forget about the the one that initially gave you the talent and wrote out your whole life story... the one that has created you with purpose.. so here I am depending on people to make me and get me where i want to be, rather than God himself?? No way! for my own sake I needed to just be on my own for a min. just to know where is it that He truly wants me to stand. What really is his purpose in my life? be within 4 walls and lead worship to the people that decide to stay within those 4 walls? Or can it be to truly take it to the streets? see, i've come to the conclusion that you don't need to be involved in ministry to do ministry. God is the one that uses us and takes us to the place he wants us to be when we are READY. I'm still in training for what my mission will be. and i'm ready for the breaking and molding more than ever. When I head to ministry I want my heart to be ready for it all. the good, the bad, and the ugly. I want to be compassionate. I want to give real hope. want to give UNCONDITIONAL LOVE. Just as God gave the people, the lost, the dirty, the unwanted, the disowned, the unloved, the hated, the broken...

This is my reason.

2009

This year I truly hope to get ALOT accomplished. not that i didn't accomplish much in 08', but just want to do more. Here are some things that I accomplished.

**2008**
-Lost over 40Lbs.. (Huge Accomplishment!!)
-Made the commitment of going back to school. (Although massage therapy was no longer available... I tried!!)
-Found a stable church to stay commited to.

**Things for 2009... Oh boy!!**
-Get a new Car.
-Go to school for music.
-Learn to play guitar or Piano (going for Guitar! ;))
-Get rid of ALL bills/loans... ( Yes! I got bills. )
-Be more responsible.
-be more organized.

This is it... think I will make it for 2009??...
I pray I do!!! Let me know what ya think...

Love ya ,
-Diana

01/04/2009

PHE-NOMENAL!!!!! I can honestly say that Sunday night was one of the best experiences I have had in a long time. Pastor Benny's preaching really Hit home for me. No more revolving doors here!! ----> Heading the right way, not looking back!! To see the people of God have that intimate time of worship, and just surrender it ALL at the feet of Christ... I don't think there's any word that can describe the joy that brings me. To know that we at Freedom Culture are truly making a change in our community... It's awsome! I really hope that if you live in miami and are not commited or attending a church that you may take some time and visit. I assure you, you are going to not only enjoy yourself.. and if you don't... i'll treat you to.... STARBUCKS!!!!!!! k guys talk to you later.... be blessed, and please take P.B's advice and read Psalms 139:1-14. It really is good for you!

Much love,
-Diana

Food for today

So... you're most likely wondering what the heck I'm going to talk about as you read the title. Lol

It's funny how we can go throughout our days and not really pay attention to what we eat. most of you might not know, but all my life I've maintained my average weight (180 Lbs) until I hit 17-18 and that's when I was told that I had Hypothyroidism. A condition in which the thyroid gland produces an insufficient amount of thyroid hormone. So I went up in weight (235 Lbs.)Basically it lowers my metabolism, hence making it harder for me to loose weight. but I have declared myself healed, and decided to eat healthy and keep myself active. In doing so I have lost exactly 40 Lbs bringing me to 195 Lbs. This alone is a major accomplishment, however these past 3 days have been really bad. Why?? I'll tell you why... @ work we are having a secret Santa exchange or as Sharon would say, Secret baby Jesus... Lol so I thought well, since I can't give everyone a gift because I'm not RICH YET... I'll make little Christmas candy bags for them. ***BAD IDEA!!!*** I went to the store to buy all the candy and then one little bag caught my eye. It was my favorite chocolates from my childhood times. Creme Drops. I can honestly tell you I ate 2 bags of those things. Yes!! All by myself!! and now, I feel horrible!!!!!! all I'm thinking about is how much I weight!!! Lol besides that though, I'm having this down-time from all the sugar. And I don't feel good @ all. The most successfull thing I've done @ work all day is writing this blog... and Michele (Co-worker) is my witness. I have felt so horrible to the point of almost knocking out on my desk, tripping over nothing while waking, and holding on to everything I see just to make it to my chair and sit down. you may laugh but I'm so serious.. I began to think about the situations, and thought to myself... how many things am I feeding my spirit that might just not be as edifying as it looks? cuz let me tell you those Creme Drops looked really good, but at the end of the day the more I ate them the more I wanted them. The funniest yet realistic part was that I kept offering some to Michele and she took one but never ate it. Reason being??... She stated that I looked like I was addicted to those Creme Drops, and she didn't want to get to that point. All I know is that although this might be a funny situation, it really made me think about what I was feeding my Spirit and mind. Sometimes we might feel Down and out. Maybe on the... "I want to give up type of outlook on life.." that's when it hits us. I don't ever want to feel spiritually the way I did today on the physical side. Hopefully this helps you out...

I know it helped me. trust me, I'm never eating a bag of Creme Drops on my own again!!

Much love,

-Diana

Bowling

On Sunday a Group of us from freedom Culture went bowling, and I hadn't had that much fun in a while. It was awesome!! Pastor B, Sadrina, Roobz, and I were in one team, and Ramiro, Angelo, Ernesto, and Marcos were in the other. The funniest part was that we were trying so hard, and then, after a while we finally realized that there was this major league next to us. I mean right when we thought that we were kickin butt, we all felt... horrible. I mean there was this one kid and I mean KID, he was killing me. He hit every single one like right on the dot. I was so impressed. It literally made me want to go bowling every weekend just so I can get that good!
Pastor B was too funny as usual. Ernesto was just trying to break the record for his own speed. with was 20 whatever that means... lol and the rest of us were just trying to make ONE strike. lol As far as my bowling, for some reason every time (and I mean EVERY TIME) I was up to bowl I would drop all of them except that one. it was so frustrating. I wanted to go up there myself and drop the SPECIAL PIN!!!!!! lol Hope you all can make it next time!

Much love,
-Diana

Trusting Times...

How hard is it for you to trust? So you meet this guy/girl, and you trust them... NOT!!
You finally meet your father after years of not knowing who he was, and you trust him... NOT!!!
You see a dog/cat in the street with it's owner and whats the 1st thing you ask? Can I pet it, does it bite? Why ask?? Why not just go and pet the animal?? You re bigger than the animal is right? and have more intelligence than they have right? so why not just pet it? TRUST. See if you just go for it, you're going to have a fear of it biting you. Why? The animal has no idea who you are or where you come from. The same way you don't just run up to the animal and grab it and squeeze it. lol. The reason why I bring this up is simply because I right now I'm in a trusting stage. Yes!! Trusting Stage. I'm not sure if it's that I have gone through some things that have made it harder for me to trust, or what, but It's just hard for me. To believe that someone is telling you the complete truth, and for you to believe them 100%... tuff stuff. Like I said this is something that I am learning to do and handle. I trust God with all my heart, and even that took long enough for me to do. but funny how God doesn't need to get to know us to trust us. or even test us to trust us. Since before we were born He knew us, and entrusted us all with a purpose, with His Love, with His word, with His Son. That, I believe, is enough for us to Trust Him with our lives.

Still in training,
-Diana

1st time in a long time...

Sunday night @ freedom Culture was amazing. I mean I know I'm a little behind on my days but I just have to share this with you all. Sunday night was the 1st night in a long time that I once again led worship. this time along with Jerry, and again I say it was truly amazing! I led worship with Jerry like 2X's before this last one, and every time I do it's awesome. It's like Jerry and I can be singing something totally different and still be on the same page. We can be in 2 totally different keys and still sound amazing. Although this is great it's not about our talent, or even about how much we know each other or get along, this would have never happened if Jerry and myself had not decided to step back and allow God to move the way He wanted to.
It's just awesome that that attitude came not only from him and myself but from the leaders, just as Sharon said in her blog. Leading worship brought me back to the reality that God was not done with me. God is just starting another chapter in my life, and I am excited to know where it's going to lead me. Just to know that God has not given up on me. God has not thrown in the towel and just said "I'm done with her!" To know that our God still has plans set for us, and all we gotta do is say "Here I am lord, Use me."

-Diana